counting down the days to CNY'2016 !!!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR MY FRIENDS ^^ finally its gonna be chinese new year, this time. will everything be the same as last year ? each year. the tradition is degrading.. idk ,, its not the same as it was anymore.. people just take the chance to dress up nicely,. get some ang bao money... then spend it all on gambling... then thats it ??? thats chinese new year now ? sighs.. i wish they still keep the traditions..,. this year, spring cleaning ? its not longer done as a family... its so sad and different... its 3 days to cny and my hse isn't decorated yet... whads the point when no visiting is even organised? its so hard to even plan one now,.. everyone in diff school.. everyone have different schedules ... i don't wanna miss this cny w them.. cause i know , if we skipped this year. who knows when will we ever meet again :(
been so happy shopping this year ! ^^ so proud of myself cause i paid everything myself now and i even can afford clothes for my sister. :) different style from last year, lets hope i can start this year on a positive note. can't wait to update this space again after cny ^^
also counting down the days before i turn legal. gonna miss being 17, because many blessed events happened when I'm 17. really thankful for all the wonderful events that happened. so here's a short summary of my chapter 17 ;)
thank you 2015 for a wonderful chapter in my life.. i was really lucky to get into PFP, @ NP. thank you for blessing me w such good results. thank you for the wonderful new classmates found. I'm really lucky to have met joanne, liani, chee yong, mathan, shi hui, rénee, jia ying, bella and merick.
without them, class would have been totally different..
and of course, i won't forget my 3 kids, alex, reinhard and glen. thank you for walking through 2015 w me.. thank you for always being there for me ( most of the time LOL ) . shixuan, for always entertaining me . and my two assholes friends. neets and darryl. thanks for remembering me. thanks for not forgetting me even tho you all got new best friends. i never wanted to call anyone my best friends , cause best friends eventually leaves. and only good friends stays.. lastly, the girls that I've lost contact w... cleo and ely. I'm sorry we drifted so much. but i hope we are still the goodest friends ever. to many more years w everyone listed ^^
really thankful for being blessed at work too. without them, i won't be who i am today. especially my genki family @ oc... que, elvin, kei , tan, ali, shaheer. thank you for being the best working buddies. thank you for everything you taught me. especially kei, my KL jiejie, .hehehe . I'm really happy we became such good friends. thank you for being my listening ear. thank you for guiding me a lot during work. ^^ not to forget my kitchen family too.. chef david and ah tai ~~ big thank you to both of them for pampering me most of the time. and ming mei and the aunty lee wah. ^^ thank you for taking care of me while i was working. I'm really lucky to have met all of you . <3 simon and ah jian also, thanks for being such good colleagues. always buying me drinks and stuff ~ lastly, leong and zhen. thanks for being my 好朋友 ! without them, working will definitely be different.. thanks for pampering me the most, always giving me good and extra food. thank you for all the cares you shown and given. thank you for feeding me into a fat little pig. :P
most importantly, my family. thank you for everything you given me last year. times was hard, i was working most of the time. thank you for understanding me. thank you for all the patience you shown and given me. I'm sorry sometimes i rebelled. I'm just tired. i just want a little freedom. i have my stress too... so many times i break down alone, crying.. but i can't tell anyone. I'm really tired. I'm sorry. thank you my family i love you all. <3
the most important character in my chapter 17 is leong. thank you for coming into my life. you taught me a lot of stuff. you changed me, you shaped me. thank you for telling me stuff that others won't. thank you for all the bus rides home,and memories created. although things are hard and complicated between us. im really grateful for everything that has happened so far. I'm not going to pursue a future w you. not until you can tell me that i will be the only one. for now, lets just keep things the way it is. i will wait for you. until you make a decision. i never know loving someone requires so much courage,. and because of you. I've found mine the courage to chase my happiness. things won't be easy for the three of us , but ill do wtv it takes to make sure things won't be hard for you. thank you for all these precious memories. i hope we can still create more tgt. :)
i hope this year, when i turn 18. you can still continue to write this chapter w me. and most importantly, spend my birthday w me. that will be the best present ill ever need. <3
♥ Embrace the magic
Saturday, 23 January 2016
im not an expert in relationship. I'm not good at all, but i still wanna speak my mind about whad i think about it... if two people are happily in love. no matter who or whad comes in your way, you will be able to overcome it. if he truly loves you, he won't be swayed by others. and if she really loves you she won't give up easily. that whads going to keep the relationship going... years and days and months and time is just a time factor in the whole journey. you can know everything about each other but eventually come to realise , i can't love him/her anymore. why is that so ? is it cause you became bored? or is it cause you became so used to the other party, that now its not that special anymore ?
when you fell in love w someone else again, do you know that you are gonna hurt all three involving party ? first, you betrayed the girl who gave you her entire heart. second, you're hurting the other girl whom you can't protect. and lastly, yourself. you're not killing two birds with one stone.. you're being killed by two birds with one stone. eventually, we are all gone be killed. why did we still choose to walk down this path ? knowing its gonna be a painful journey... knowing that it will bleed us dry. because we all have this emotion and feeling inside of us. and that is love.
so many ways to show your love for one person. so many ways to say that I'm in love.
if you love him, let him go. if his heart isn't with you anymore, whads the point in keepin? when its gonna hurt you even more eventually when he finally decided to leave..
if she loves him, let him go. let him stay with her, let him go back to her. maybe its the best thing you can do for him because you can't be with him at all. so don't spoil their relationship anymore. let him pursue happiness with her all over again. let him find love in her once again. if he is meant to be yours, he will not be able to stay there for long. sometimes we just have to learn to let the one we love go, because we can't do anything or guarantee anything to keep them by our side too.
if he knows whats best for him, let him decide. don't do anything to make him think twice and be afraid to pursue whad he really wants..
hello uncle foong, I'm really happy with you, you filled my heart . you was my everything, i really love you a lot. and now, I'm going keep you in my heart forever. because i know you can't let her go, so whad if we both love each other? does it actually matters ? i guess not, because you're still together with her, and there is nothing that you are gonna do. and there is nothing she will do to let you go. she is holding onto you, and you are scared to let go. you are scared of our future. whad if our relationship fails. that is whad you are afraid of, you do not dare to face it. and there is nothing i can do to force you to face this future with me. i can't let you go just like that, cause why must i let someone take happiness away from me. when we both clearly is aware of our feelings for each other now... but since you are not gonna do anything. i will wish you and her a blissful future. but please promise me , you will never fall for another girl again. but don't you think you are letting her down ? you are hindering her chance of finding the right guy that will love her better than you and not disappoint her ? i love you despite the fact that you got her.. we confessed our feelings knowing that it won't be strong and lasting if you are still in a relationship with her . 你怕什么 ？ 我爱上了你，我会勇敢地去面对未来的obstacles。。我多想带你回家，告诉全家人我找到了我最爱的男人。只是我不能这样做。如果你不爱她了，那你会不会放走她？ 你会让她离开吗 ？如果你做不到，请告诉，请你叫我走。我心里真的很乱，明明就相爱彼此，却不能在一起。我好想叫你和她分手，可是我不能这样自私。好吧，你就自己看着办。你选择她，我会为你感到快乐。你选择我，那我们就一起努力吧。可是，现在我就先和你说声： 谢谢你啊良，谢谢你让我感觉到幸福的滋味。这一年来，我真的很开心。我们的美好回忆我都会收在心里。你虽然不是个有钱人，又不是什么大帅哥。我从没想过自己会爱上你。以前的我，对男人的要求是高了一点。可是遇见了你，我就知足了。我不需要过个富贵的生活，只要有你在，我真的很满足了。有些话，我很想告诉你，可是现在不是时候，我都希望我能抱着你，跟你说声我爱你，谢谢你。可是我无能为力。所以我只能在这说。你教了我很多。我也从你身上学会了很多，我变了。我再也不是以前的我，我希望你能少吸烟，你还年轻，我不要你老了后悔啊。你其实不笨，你只是懒惰学习罢了。如果你不放弃学习，我相信你一定可以找到一个好工作。你最后一个目标就是在23岁前买间屋子。我知道你信的。我相信你。好朋友我祝福你，未来的日子，不管你选择谁，我都为你感到开心。 我爱你 uncle foong.
Labels: goodbye my love
♥ Embrace the magic